Growing up I had TONS of different collections: stamps, coins, rocks, shot glasses, lion king trading cards, beanie babies, and postcards, just to name a few. I was always a “saver” and liked to keep things, which is strange because my mother is about as bare bone as it gets when it comes to saving things. Her motto is “if you’re not using it, toss it” (or give it to someone who needs it). More recently I’ve not only started to agree with this motto, but have also decided that collections are a bad thing. I mean think about it. Really, its the first step of hoarding…just in an organized fashion, or as I like to call it “Hoarganization”. One day you have a stamp collection and before you know it you have 3 dead cat skeletons under your coach-which are only found because an entire team of professional organizers are overhauling your home so you don’t lose your kids. And really, is it worth that much?
Ok, so you (like every other person) probably have/had a shot glass collection. Cool. You go somewhere like Cape Cod, or Disney World and get some awesome shot glass to put on the shelf with all the other ones. Chances are, if you are actively collecting shot glasses you aren’t old enough to use them (legally). Furthermore, seriously, what do you do with the 50 shot glasses you have?…Do you A. have 50 friends? B. have 50 friends that all want to take a shot at the same time? or C. have enough liquor to fill them all up? If your answer to all three of those questions is yes, then please email me…sounds like you and your friends know how to have a good time and I’d like to join in .
Or how about people who “collect rocks”? Now, that’s just effing retarded. If you’re under 10 and you’re doing this outside on your own time that’s acceptable, but if you get to the point where you are paying money for them, that’s just crossing the line. I’m not gonna lie…I may or may not have a purchased rock collection similar to the one in this picture here, but I’m NOT proud of it.
The worst has to be the bottle collections, if you ask me. I think this is more of a “college boy” thing more than anything else-which makes sense because college boys are ridiculous (obviously). Have you ever gone into a guy’s apartment and on top of their cabinets they have dozens and dozens of beer bottles? Awesome…you are sooooo cool! You drink all kinds of different beers AND you save the bottles?! wow…now this is really a hoarder in the making…Can’t even throw away trash. Anyways, if you are really drinking that much beer, you should probably consider recycling that bottles!
After reading this, if you still feel that your collection is a necessary part of your life, hopefully your collection is at least something awesome like shoes, or puppies, or money. Just please, for the love of god, don’t be like the Duggars and start collecting babies (#20 is on the way), YIKES!