The Nonsensical Bathroom Nesting Phenomenon

For years, maybe even decades, I have been aware that there are people out there who won’t sit on a public john. Heck, there are even people out there who won’t use one at all…you know who you are.   I get it.  Sometimes they are gross.  Maybe a little pee on the seat, maybe no toilet paper, maybe a day old deuce floating around.  Here’s what I DON’T get.   The “nesters”.  Now it’s not the concept of the nesting that I don’t understand, it’s the aftermath of said action.  Now if I had to guess, I’d say nesters nest because they don’t want their bum touching something that someone else’s bum has already touched.  Ok, so far I follow.  Where I get lost is why they leave the nest on the seat when they’re through.  It’s like they’re saying “Your ass is dirty and I don’t want my bare butt touching a seat it touched, but my ass…well my ass is amazing, oh, and also I’m super lazy, so please, feel free to use my pre-made nest.  Just make sure that you dispose of it when you’re through because if you don’t I’m not going to use that stall and I’m going to monopolize a whole nother stall with my nesting skills”.

Let it be known that this post is not based off a real experience I’ve had, it IS an experience I’ve had…2 times in a week…in the same building!  Come on people!  Get it together!